On Giving Myself Grace

I'm fresh of of vacationing in Costa Rica and feeling physically tired from 5 busy days of exploring the country but mentally refreshed. One of my favorite things about vacation (beyond the obvious like beautiful scenery and what not) is coming back with a fresh new perspective and feeling like my mind really had the time to reset. Before leaving I'd already been thinking a lot about the direction of this blog and about this stage I'm in where I'm really trying to give myself space to rest and the freedom to learn and make mistakes along the way whether it be in my day to day life or with blogging. 

For starters, let's talk about the blog. To be transparent, I haven't been posting as much as I originally planned and it's not because I'm just really that busy. Initially I thought I'd do weekly posts but once I got started I was feeling like I was beginning to manufacture content to keep up with that schedule. Further more, the content I was coming up with was confined to the parameters I'd set out in the beginning: sharing my knowledge as a holistic doctor for those who might be new or still learning on their journey to leading a more holistic lifestyle. Once I was aware of that two things clicked in my mind: 1) I want to make sure what I'm sharing feels truly inspired and more importantly based on the feedback from you guys (my readers) and 2) this is my blog so I'm free to make changes to the direction and content without feeling negatively about it in some way. Ok, I know I only said two but now that I'm thinking about it let's throw in number three: everything that is living grows and evolves including this blog which is an expression of me! This is where grace comes in. 

I talked a little bit in some older posts about easing into this year and I've definitely been doing that with some moments harder than others. What slowing down has really taught me though is being able to really learn from each moment and give myself room to develop. I have a tendency to be super hard on myself, creating these often unrealistic goals (disclaimer: I'm all about setting big goals but they should be actionable, measurable, and reasonable in regards to your time frame, OK?) and beating myself up when I didn't accomplish them. On top of that, I had visions for my life that were oftentimes so rigid I did not allow myself any flexibility to make room for new direction and ideas based on new experiences and personal development. I've been thinking about this so much as it relates to the blog because I set out to do one thing, but as I've actually gotten things rolling I'm feeling like I want to do something just a tad different. Me a few months ago would've kept pounding a square peg into a round hole (or whatever the heck that saying is.) Instead, I'm extending myself grace. Allowing myself to change directions, make mistakes, and fail. 

When I say "grace" I mean it in the context of God's grace towards us from a biblical perspective. From my understanding of the concept, God's grace for us means that we have forgiveness, love, compassion, and favor extended our way regardless of our merits (or lack there of). Having grace for myself is extending love, compassion, kindness, and understanding towards myself not because I'm awesome all the time, but rather as an expression of self love. What does all this have to do with the blog and my life path? When I extend myself grace and allow myself to be an evolving, mistake-making human I allow myself room to grow into the highest version of myself. What if I were to keep pushing into rigid ideals and pumping out uninspired content? Or even worse, steering myself into a life path that was never meant for me but rather based on some externally imposed expectations of what my life and success "should" look like. Basically, it'd be all bad because I'd be doing myself and other a huge disservice.

All that considered, I'm stepping into that grace and allowing myself to evolve here. You can expect to see more personal posts like this one in additional to my tips/informational posts. I'll also be asking some friends to guest post because I'm not the "expert" on everything wellness related and they are always teaching me too! Looking forward to growing and evolving with y'all. <3